Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Life comes back

I was at the bookstore today, looking at the cards, when I saw this one:

I don't feel like I've been massively depressed over the past six months or anything, but I DO feel like I've been in a little bit of a fog that I'm just now starting to shake off. I was standing in my bedroom today and I thought about the day I moved in, and I was like, wait ... Christmas has happened since then? January? February? Almost the whole month of March? Where was I when all that happened? I've done well at work and been present and all of that, but the rest of it is a little bit of a haze. I liked this card because it's like, no matter how crazy or sad or uncertain or challenging something is, life always comes back eventually and helps us feel normal and hopeful again.

I moved halfway across the country by myself once before--well, twice, I guess, if you count college--and this one has been easier in some ways and a little bit harder in other ways. Overall, I think it has gone OK, and the even better news is that I am starting to feel life coming back, like myself again. It's not all at once--I sometimes feel like I'm standing on one of those half-exercise balls, getting on, wobbling, falling off, getting back up, wobbling around some more--but I am getting there.

Some updates:

- My apartment. It's almost the way I want it. I wanted to scale back a little and not have things laying around that I never use, so I moved a bunch of stuff down to the basement storage (you know I can't TOTALLY get rid of it!). My favorite is the little dining area--I call it my nook. My friend teases me about it, he says there is nothing nook-like about it, it's just a regular dining area, but to me, it's my nook, and I adore it. It's the one place where I can sit and see the rest of the apartment, and I sit at the table by the window and listen to my music and work.

- My neighborhood. It is adorable, even more so when it is not buried under a foot of snow (funny how that works, huh?). I love the buildings and all the trees and the cute little shops. One of the guys at work told me about this pizza place right by me that is PHENOMENAL, so freaking good. Too good, probably, a thought that occurred to me as I sat there eating a slice or three in front of The Biggest Loser of all shows. (By the way, speaking of Biggest Loser, OH, MY GOSH, that Mike, he is cuter and sweeter than a whole basket full of puppies and babies. I LOVE that kid.)

- Coffee shop situation. I still miss my old place something crazy. I've been back to the birthday place once since then, and it was good, but I'm not totally, totally positive about it yet. I will probably go back sometime this week ... cross your fingers!

- Work. My schedule has been insane, which has not really helped in the adjustment department, but everyone has been SUPER nice, which HAS helped. I've fit in and gotten comfortable a lot faster than I expected, which has been a nice bonus. (I even pitched my first big fit a couple of weeks ago ... I really AM getting settled in! HA.)

- Working out. I have been horrible about working out and, consequently, my back feels like it belongs to a 90-year-old, so this week I am determined to be better. I've gone to the gym the last two days, which pretty much sets a 2009 record, sooo ... so far, so good.

- The boys. They are ridiculous. But that is a whole nother blog post.

- Book club. I've gone twice to the one book club. There are about a dozen girls in it, all around my age, all very nice. I'm not really sure how to be friends with any of them outside of the group, but for now it's nice to go out to dinner with a bunch of girls once a month and talk about a book and, oh yeah, Brad and Angelina and the crazy spinning instructor they know who has bedded half the women in his class and other fun things like that. There is another book club, but I sort of think it might fizzle out--everyone is just way, way (did I mention WAY?) too different. Awkwardly so.

- Completely off topic and unrelated to anything: I bought the cutest green trench coat today. I think we are in love.

That's about it for me! What's new with you?


At 10:19 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, Swishy, what a sweet and so approiate card. I so know those feelings! The good thing, as you pointed out, is feelings/funks go change and life has a way of making things right again. I can't tell you enough how much those 2 cd's you sent me make me feel so happy when I drive. Pure good feelings.

It sounds like, despite the challenges, things are settling pretty well. I know when the sun comes and stays, it will make things even better. So much to do there when the weather is great. You are so close to my sister-in-law, a sweetheart, who could give me some tips for you. Of course you proably are getting an overload of tips on life there. Just a thought.

I'm glad your apartment is coming along and your "nook" makes it feel even more like a home. We all need a special place like that.

Sending hugs and sunshine.

At 10:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry I spelled appropriate wrong, brain fog.

At 10:27 AM, Blogger Trish Ryan said...

Love that card. It's perfect in so many ways. I'm guessing the green trench coat has similar qualities :)

Thanks for reminding me that big moves don't leave you foggy forever.

At 10:45 AM, Blogger Bina said...

I'm glad that you are almost settled in and feeling like home. I'm sure you will feel that eventually anyway!

I've moved many times in my life, once from Hawaii to North Carolina! It takes a while to get settled and feel like you are home, but then one day, you don't even realize it's how you have felt for a while. The routines, the places, it just all clicks and you are finally "home". I hope that happens for you in the next few months.

And I want to see pictures of your place! Work and home. No address or anything, I know you don't want to be stalked! LOL

At 12:10 PM, Blogger Beth said...

love the card....and I love that you're doing so good. and who is this "friend"?//hmmmm????? we want the whole scoop!!!

At 3:13 PM, Blogger Elle Charlie said...

Glad to hear you're feeling more like yourself - that's great news! I'm glad you posted that card, it filled me with hope that my life will come back around too!

Your apartment sounds great - pics?

I want to hear about the boys!!!!

At 10:52 PM, Anonymous Ree said...

I want to see the trench coat.

I'm so glad you're feeling more settled. I think Spring may have something to do with it?

At 10:54 PM, Blogger Eileen said...

I think we need pictures of the apartment. Our place is all puppy these days. He rules out life. Small man- big personality

At 12:06 AM, Blogger MaNiC MoMMy™ said...

Can I just tell you how much I love your blog posts? ANd that you are in love with your trench coat!

AND that I am commenting from a LAPTOP in my BED! (I am test-driving one and LOVING the fact that I am not chained to my office.)

AND, I want some of that pizza! And, some ridiculous boys!

At 10:56 AM, Blogger Betty said...

Life always comes back eventually. I like that truism. I think yours will be totally back once you find yourself in a committed relationship with a spy-laden coffee shop.


At 12:18 PM, Blogger Andie said...

I turned 32.

I started my own photography business.

I had brunch at commander's palace.

hmmmmm what else?

and I'm glad you're getting settled in! and isn't it interesting how sometimes, we come across a card or fortune in a cookie or something that totally snaps us back to normal? I had one of those moments last year!

At 1:22 PM, Blogger Melek said...

i think the final piece to feeling 100% back to YOU, is finding your coffee shop. so, get on it! we need more spy stories :)

but seriously, glad things are starting to unfog for you! maybe once spring hits in your area, that'll help out too.

At 4:26 PM, Blogger Jess Riley said...

Just popping by to say I MISS YOU and am so glad things are settling in for you...also, photos! Of the green trench coat! Need to see!

(And need to hear the BOYS stories!!!)

At 8:58 PM, Blogger Michelle said...

Oh I so get that feeling. I was just thinking earlier today that I can't believe it's already a quarter of the year almost gone. Where did it go? I don't do winter well. I need spring and the sunshine to really feel alive.

Glad things are working out for you!

At 5:05 PM, Blogger kim said...

I don't like to spend a lot money on something when I know there are too many bargains to be had in this world -- with the exception of finding a great coat. I can spend, guilt free, full price money on the right coat. Green is my favorite color -- must see the coat.

At 10:53 AM, Blogger Vanessa said...

Moving is exceptionally stressful, right up there with death and divorce. Sometimes it takes a while for the dust to settle before you can look around and say, "hey, this is kinda cool!" Glad your fog is lifting.

At 11:50 PM, Blogger shopgirl said...

What a great card - I think I may have to steal it and write those words on my bathroom mirror. I feel like that lately too. Losing my job in January was the pits - and I cannot believe that it's now almost TWO months later!! I thought I'd never get through it -but I did and I'm finally feeling like me again.

Oh- I've given you an award! If you'd like to claim it - hop on over and take it!!


Glad you're feeling settled in and tell us more about your new love - the Green trench!! I Love springs coats!!

At 2:25 PM, Blogger Tanya said...

You know, I could mail you some kind of tasty snack from your coffee shop. Since my company moved over by the airport, its only like a 15 minute drive. Would that complete your cheering up?

At 3:10 PM, Blogger Monnik said...

I bought a green trench this season too. It's got a rounded collar and adorable gold buttons. We too, are in love.

I love that card you posted. It's just so... TRUE.


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