Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Monday, February 23, 2009

Gossip Girl (Oscar edition)

Well, hello there! I have been working like a crazy lady lately, which is why I didn't do a live blog for the Oscars--I was at work. I DID, however, get to watch the red carpet on a live feed, and OH, MY GOSH, BEST THING EVER!!! It's like looking through your neighbor's window with binoculars (not that, uh, anyone we know would ever do that) only a million zillion times better. (Unless, of course, your neighbors are Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, and they're having a dinner party with Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer while George Clooney babysits the kids in the next room. Maybe then.)

Anyway, the first thing I realized is that no one is interviewed live for the pre-Oscar red carpet. (Hello, illusions shattered!) The other deal with the live feed is that there's no lighting, so you see everyone exactly as they are in real life. WHICH IS AWESOME.

A few little tidbits:

- Tim Gunn walked around looking confused a LOT.

- Amy Adams looked great on the actual show but her makeup was really harsh without the lighting.

- Taraji Henson was just as happy as can be and spent a lot of time talking to the kids from Slumdog Millionaire. Her dress looked really heavy--she needed like three people to lift it up so she could step onto the platform to be interviewed.

- Mickey Rourke was carrying around a cigarette the whole time. He looked surprisingly better than I thought he would, though. I mean, not GOOD, but you know. Not as bad as I thought.

- Anne Hathaway is very freckly on her arms and back. I guess it makes sense that she would burn and freckle, since she's so fair, but her skin always looks so porcelain-y with the lighting.

- Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick had to tape their interview like three times. Matthew looked completely bored. Sarah Jessica kept trying to smile at him and he was NOT having it.

- Brad and Angelina looked INCREDIBLE. They really did look the best. They were very nice and friendly to everyone (although Angelina looked a little like "WTF?" when Tim Gunn grabbed her wrist as she walked by). The BEST, though, was Brad totally almost walking into one of those golden Oscar statues on the red carpet. HA HA HA. He did this exaggerated double take, like, whoa, and Angelina laughed.

I'm cruising through the actual show on DVR now. Did you watch it? Did you like Hugh Jackman? Did you like the whole "five presenter" thing for the acting awards? Who looked the best? Who looked the worst? And can you believe the director cut to Brangelina while Jennifer was presenting? ME NEITHER!


At 7:08 AM, Blogger Jenster said...


Okay. It's early and I'm pre-caffinated so just keep that in mind:

I did like Hugh Jackman! He was a little pitchy in places like that (I've been watching too much Randy Jackson), but he's always entertaining and I'm always happy to watch. Even if he's just standing there.

I really liked the whole five presenter thing. Really a lot. I loved how each nominee was honored that way because really, they were freakin' nominated!

I'll have to get back to you on the best/worst. For the most part I thought everyone looked nice. I didn't like Reese Witherspoon's dress. I do remember that.

I KNOW!!! The whole Jennifer/Brangelina thing made me very uncomfortable and yet I couldn't take my eyes away!! They all handled themselves quite well, but still! Was that necessary?? (Seeing as how everybody is talking about it I suppose it served its purpose.)

Okay. I can go on with my day now. Thanks for being here for me!

At 9:31 AM, Blogger Betty said...

I was working last night too and missed the Oscars, but I was fascinated by your live feed info, especially the part about Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick. Ya know, I never thought they were a well-matched couple.....I guess he's just not that into her.


At 10:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I actually YELLED at my TV when they cut to Angelina when Jennifer was talking. OHNOTHEYDIDN'T.

At 11:00 AM, Blogger Karen said...

(Coughs embarrassed), I sort of fell asleep and missed THE WHOLE CEREMONY! But the red carpet was a little strange, I guess it always is, that's it's thing, right?!

SJP looked off her game on the version they showed on tv, and you could still tell that Matthew Broderick was beyond bored. I can't wait to read more about what I missed!

At 12:19 PM, Blogger MaNiC MoMMy™ said...

Live feed ROCKS! We had it on Betty but I think there was some defunctoid thing going on. I texted you last night because Swishy's live blog on Oscar night is like THE NEXT BEST THING TO BEING THERE!

Some of my comments:
Hated SJP's dress and she and Matthew looked terrible. She had a boob job, yeah?

Loved Zac and Vanessa, cuz I just do!

Liked the way they honored all the actors and actresses this year instead of showing the clips--totally classy.

Ben Stiller--hilarious as Joaquin.

I wondered if when Jennifer A got on stage if Angelina pinched Brad and whispered, "There's that slut ex-wife of yours." Bwhaahah. You know the whole world was watching those two couples to see if anything would happen! Also wondered if Angelina and Brad made a pact: "OK, no hand holding or PDA during the show cuz Jen and John are behind us." They were a cool couple all night long, weren't they!? Love 'em though! Really want to be a fly on their wall!

At 12:34 PM, Blogger Beth said...

OMG!!!!!! I thought of YOU the whole time I was watching and I wanted to talk to you SO BAD!!! BRAD AND ANGIE AND JEN!!!!! OMFG!!! and I LOVE that they cut to Angie when jen was up there....a few feet away from them!!!! AHHHHHHH...it made my whole night!!! LOVED IT!!!

I liked Hugh...he's funny and entertaining without beng obnoxious.

and they totally TAPE those interviews? it's not LIVE when they're walking down the carpet??? I. am. crushed. They have misled me all these years. I feel violated.

so you think it's true about SJP and her husband splitting?

I still love Tim Gunn but the man can't read a cue card worth nuthin.

Natalie Portman looked BEAUTIFUL!!!

But girl, you need to have your own stinkin Oscar show!!!!!


At 1:16 PM, Blogger Alex said...

I think Hugh Jackman did a great job. The opening number was AMAZING! It looked like it took months of practice (but I think he said he found out he was hosting a month ago?)

I loved the 5 presenter thing! Such a great idea and most of the presenters did such a wondferful job.

I HATED Tilda Swinton's dress. OMG. It was so saggy it made her look saggy. It brought out the wrinkles in her face somehow. I just hated it. Also Jessica Biel's dress did not do her justice. Freida Pinto's dress screamed "prom" to me.

I thought Marisa Tomei looked AMAZING. She just glowed. I don't think she has ever looked so good. I had to google her age after I saw her because I was so impressed.

Why does Angelina always wear black!? She looked good but I'd like to see her in something less safe. I think she was one of the only big stars in black! Her jewelry was fabulous though.

At 2:59 PM, Blogger Kristabella said...

I'm sad to admit this, but 2009 makrs the year I am so over award shows. I thought maybe it was the Globes and how boring they were. But this year's Oscars telecast? WORST EVER! It was so boring and drawn out. We don't need all those musical numbers. And while I liked the idea of the 5 previous winners talking to the nominees, it just made the show that much longer.

BRING BACK JON STEWART! Or, even better, get Ricky Gervais to host!

At 3:54 PM, Blogger Crazed said...

OF COURSE they would cut to Angelina during Jen's time.... Did you catch how prepared Ang was for it? All smiles and bliss. Love it. Tilda Swinton... Find new stylist.
I liked the 5 presenter thing.. every nominee got a little more attention... and especially when the big catagories were pretty much givens this year.
Now... how did you like that despite not being at the ceremony Tom Cruise was able to make such a huge impression during a Jimmy Kimmel Commercial?! Best ever!
Miss you. One day our phone calls will sync with one another!

At 4:21 PM, Blogger Swishy said...

OK ... I decide I liked the five-presenter thing because part of the whole point of the Oscars is seeing everyone and what they're wearing, and this way you got to see way more people. Plus some of the nominees seemed genuinely touched.

And I totally forgot!!! Can we talk about Robin Wright and Sean Penn? What is the deal? I thought they were getting divorced! He didn't thank her, did he? That is so weird to me.

At 7:07 PM, Blogger TTQ said...

I prefer the online pics of the stars better than watching the actual event on tv. I had it on but was distracted by my computer.

So I come here for the rundown. Always amusing

At 8:36 PM, Blogger Jenster said...

Yeah - I was a bit surprised about the whole Sean and Robin thing, too. I also thought they were getting a divorce -- maybe she was a pity date. I didn't see a whole lot of her, but I did see one picture with the both of them and they looked fairly cozy. But then he didn't mention her in his thanks and I thought that was rude.

At 8:35 AM, Blogger Bina said...

I tried to watch the Oscars, I really did, but to me it was so freaking boring!!! They take so freaking long to go from one award to another, and I'm just not that in to it. Don't shoot me!

At 8:50 AM, Blogger Mary Ann said...

I loved the five presenter idea. It was a great way to honor the nominees and the past winners.

I'd read that Sean and Robin were back together but I noticed she was crying at first for him and then got really straight faced toward the end of his speech as if she could feel he was going to NOT thank her. Weird.

I came to the puter mid-way to see if you were live blogging...am glad to see you didn't miss the whole thing!

At 4:10 PM, Blogger The Gang's Momma said...

I watched parts. I loved HJ's spots, and little vignettes. He's so talented.

Could have done without the MILK guy's political pandering - yeah, you won. Don't shove your intolerant tolerance gospel down my throat. ('scuse the poor taste pun, didn't mean it, but now that I typed it, I'm leaving it cuz it's funny.)

Was completely embarrassed for who we've become as a nation that the producers cut to BP and AJ during JA's presentation. Come on, this is NOT junior high. Move on.

And Brad? Marry the girl already. Sheesh.

At 9:57 PM, Blogger Melek said...

i LOVED hugh jackman. he did GREAT! who knew he could sing, dance, and regenerate his wounds! so talented :)

loved the 5 presenters. thought it was really cool to see the 'old timers'. goldie hawn didn't look very good tho, did she?

LOVED the Ben Stiller impression of Juaquin...hahahahahahaah.. Reese didn't appreciate it tho.

glad you posted about it. i was wondering where you were oscar night. i generally log in to your blog during the award ceremonies :)

At 1:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Swishy! Hope all is well. I enjoyed your Oscars recap. I have to say I did stuff in front of the tv and had it on in the background. Meh. I so wanted Mickey Rourke to win. Sean Penn? Really? I mean, sure he's a good actor, but he's always so, Sean Penn, you know?

BTW, there's a new blog I think you'll enjoy - www.spottedinla.blogspot.com


At 9:50 PM, Blogger Michelle said...

Ahhhh, just the recap I needed. I was unfortunately otherwise occupied on Sunday evening so I saw none of it. Thanks :) And bummer about the work for ya.


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