Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

I'd be careful stepping off that curb if I were you

So. I'm driving along, and there's a car on the side of the road. The driver sits in the car and waits while the other person in the car, a man, gets out ... and STARTS PEEING ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!

We were not on the highway. There was an open Walmart 100 feet away. A gas station 10 feet away. A McDonald's a quarter mile one way down the road, a Wendy's the other way, a million other things in between. Most normal people would walk into any one of those places and take advantage of one of the wonderful conveniences of modern society by peeing into a free public toilet. Not this guy. This guy would rather pee on the side of the road in 7-DEGREE WEATHER, which brings me to my next, most important point: I don't even like my EARS to be exposed when it's that cold. My fingers feel like they're going to fall off after about 3 seconds. You REALLY want that out and about, waving at passing cars, in below-zero wind chills? REALLY?

Some things I will never understand.


At 2:25 PM, Anonymous dimples said...

i lerrrve your stories. and how i miss north dakota!

At 2:37 PM, Blogger Vanessa said...

Ok, now I know all the crazies are not segregated to my neck of the woods. Who does these things???

At 2:48 PM, Blogger Travis Erwin said...

Maybe it was a dare.
Maybe he was drunk.
Maybe he likes the feel of a blustery breeze on his business.

I'm just surprised you didn't get any pictures.

At 3:07 PM, Blogger Mary Ann said...

Laughing at Travis. That's a perfect comment to a fabulous Swishy posting.

At 6:33 PM, Anonymous Ree said...

Don't ever go to India. There's way more than peeing going on on the side of the road.

On the other hand, it's usually pretty warm.

At 8:17 PM, Blogger Dizzy Ms. Lizzy said...

It's a man thing - - we're not SUPPOSED to understand . . . ;-)

At 8:26 PM, Blogger Lainey-Paney said...

he must have REEEEALLY had to go.
or he was drunk.
or both.
probably both.

and I'm sure the following phrase was said moments before the car stopped, "MFer, don't pee in my car!"

At 10:22 PM, Blogger JenKneeBee said...

Ew! I really hope he was either drunk or on a dare because otherwise... he has some serious problems.

At 10:52 PM, Blogger Michelle said...

Ewwww. So wrong.

But. I will say that at least he wasn't a bus driver. I remember my bus driver in second grade would stop the bus halfway through the route each day and pee against the bus.

But ummm it never got to 7 degrees when I lived there. There has to be more to the story that you don't know!

At 12:13 AM, Blogger Michael said...

The two in the car were probably talking.

"Man, it's really cold."

"Yeah, it is. I kind of have to pee. Do you think if I peed right now, that it would freeze before it hit the ground?"

"That would be pretty cool. Maybe it would bounce."

"I'll give it a shot."

At 12:49 PM, Blogger Mandy said...

Hahaha, who does that?

At 1:24 PM, Blogger Betty said...

You're not in North Dakota, are you??!!! That particular act, when executed outdoors, is unlawful in most states!


At 5:03 PM, Blogger Swishy said...

No! I am totally not in North Dakota, not even close, although it feels like it sometimes :)

I love those conversations! Ha ha ... I bet you guys are totally right.

At 5:07 PM, Blogger Beth said...

but how muc fun to have one of those things and be able to just pee wherever and whenever you like!

At 7:14 PM, Blogger michelle said...

i was once a passenger in my ex's car, and we were driving in a fairly busy part of the city ... i looked over at and empty lot and there was a guy standing there, um, pleasuring himself. seriously! boys are freaks.

At 10:11 PM, Blogger Trish Ryan said...

Ewwww....that's nasty. Thank God you didn't have the Swishy cam with you!

At 11:35 AM, Blogger cubmommy said...


At 11:49 AM, Blogger Melek said...

oh my...that's disgusting!
maybe he just wanted to see if it would freeze in mid-air.
and where the heck are you that it's SEVEN degrees? yikes!

At 7:45 PM, Blogger Patti said...

boys like to pull it out....because they can.

At 1:56 PM, Blogger MaNiC MoMMy™ said...

Which brings me to my next important point:


And did you get that email!?!?!

At 2:03 PM, Blogger kim said...

Your ears, hahahahahhahaha!

At 6:18 PM, Blogger Bina said...

Sounds like something my husband would do. And I am not kidding!


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