Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Prepare to be amazed and astounded

So the other day a bunch of us went to the Macaroni Grill by our office for lunch. The great thing about Macaroni Grill is that they give you lots of crayons and let you draw all over big sheets of white paper on the table while you eat. You KNOW I am a big crayon hog--our waiter even brought me extras!--so I grabbed them all and drew a house and a little pencil and a Christmas tree. Having pretty much exhausted everything in my artistic repertoire, I turn to my friend, who's sitting next to me, and I'm like, let's play tic-tac-toe! He's like, no, you can't really play tic-tac-toe with a winner and a loser, let's play hangman instead. So I'm like, OK, I like hangman! Hangman it is.

I write the following on the paper

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and say, "It's a phrase." He looks at it. One second goes by, two seconds go by ... and he goes, "That's what she said." HE WAS TOTALLY RIGHT! After like two seconds! I didn't even include an apostrophe! Or write down ONE letter!

I start seriously freaking out because I cannot believe he got a four-word phrase right with ZERO letters, so I'm like, OK, I'm gonna think of something else, something super hard. Something TRULY RANDOM. Something I never say or think or even hear. EVER!

_ _ _ _
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Song or phrase, I tell him. He guesses an e, an h, a t. And then he looks at me: "Over the rainbow." And he's right. AGAIN! With just a THE!

So then I'm like, OK, this one is gonna be really hard. Really, REALLY hard. Song or thing.

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He guesses an a.

_ _ _ _ a _ a _ _
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And then he drops his napkin on the table, and his face is just like, oh, you poor kid, you tried, you really did. "Hollaback girl," he says.

HOLLABACK GIRL. With ONE letter! Why am I not pimping this person out on Wheel of Fortune and a rotation of other potentially lucrative game shows, you ask? GOOD QUESTION. I have been asking myself that all week.



We played a quick round again yesterday. TV show, I told him. He guessed e. I hadn't even filled the second e in yet, and he was like, "Sex and the City." So then he gave me one--a person. I kid you not, I must have gone through the alphabet three times. In fact, I am probably STILL going through the alphabet. I'm like, raisins? Oh, wait, RAISINS is not a person's name. Rain man? Oh, wait, that's TWO words, not one. Raibotag? Oh, wait, that's NOT EVEN A WORD.

28 Comments:

At 2:01 AM, Blogger Vanessa said...

I love Macaroni Grill and am going to remember this next time I go there. Which happens to be tomorrow. Your friend has some mad hangman skills!

 
At 2:13 AM, Blogger Manic Mom said...

SHUT UP!!!!!

I swear I have got to stop reading your blog posts at like 1:11 a.m. because I start busting out in these body-trembling giggles that don't stay INSIDE MY BODY and I know, I just know it... I'm going to wake up Mr. Manic and he will not be happy when he comes barrelling downstairs in order to kill the intruder he thinks is in our house only to find me in the office trembling with laughter over Swishy relaying a Hangman story from Macaroni Grill.

Hey, here's one. Without any letters, I'm gonna guess something... did you get a chicken sandwich for lunch?!?!?!?!?!

 
At 9:06 AM, Blogger THopgood said...

LMAO!

 
At 10:19 AM, Blogger Bina said...

Psychic maybe? Hmmm, maybe he should go on Montel!

I love how you tell your stories. You are too funny! How 'bout stand up comedian?

 
At 10:37 AM, Blogger Melek said...

Raibotag! hahaha... he must know you really well to be able to guess like that. or he's psychic.

 
At 10:48 AM, Blogger Jenster said...

That's totally freaky!! He's psychic!!

 
At 12:12 PM, Blogger KATE said...

Wow, I'm truly impressed! I also LOVE that you put That's what she said, on there. One of my favorite phrases!! hee hee

 
At 12:24 PM, Blogger Melissa said...

Wow, maybe he's Rainman! Get this man on Wheel of Fortune already!!

 
At 12:56 PM, Blogger Tanya said...

That is impressive. He's got some skillz. (yes they are so good they, its got to be spelled with a "z")

 
At 4:49 PM, Blogger Beth said...

OMG!!!! He needs to go on Wheel Of Fortune and then split the winnings with Swishy!!!!

 
At 8:32 PM, Blogger Andie said...

that is a riot!

 
At 9:52 PM, Blogger Steph said...

WOW that is pretty impressive!

 
At 3:13 AM, Blogger Barrie said...

Try giving him a hangman in, say, French! I know, I know. It's totally cheating. But it could be fun...

 
At 7:49 AM, Blogger Sue said...

I too am a crayon hogger at rest. with butcher paper table cloths!
Your repetoire sounds similar to my flower, heart, squiggles, tree.

Pimp your friend out to Wheel of Fortune!

 
At 11:30 AM, Anonymous Ree said...

Stay away from this person. He is in your brain.

 
At 3:13 PM, Blogger kim said...

Wow, I'm amazed and astounded.

you really need to get that person on wheel of fortune.

 
At 4:35 PM, Blogger TTQ said...

a) He's gay or b) you need to marry this man. Think about it, a husband who knows and provides for the most random things you need it's win-win.

 
At 5:38 PM, Blogger Mary Ann (Moanna) said...

I'm with ttq...you need to marry this man. Is he cute?

 
At 6:17 PM, Blogger Swishy said...

HA HA HA ... because he's good with words???

It truly has nothing to do with knowing me or not. (I do say "that's what she said" a lot, but the over the rainbow thing was WAY random, and honestly so was hollaback girl because I have ZERO Gwen Stefani songs and ONE No Doubt song in my little library.) He is just a word genius. If you hand him the section of the newspaper with all the word puzzles, he will have them done in no time flat. It's amazing!

 
At 2:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

you got dat right.

cletus

 
At 12:12 PM, Blogger Michael said...

Rasputin?

 
At 1:49 PM, Blogger Patti said...

marry him...

 
At 3:56 PM, Blogger Eileen said...

That is too funny! Sounds like he has played waaaay too much hangman, or really wanted to impress you.

Happy Easter to you!!

 
At 5:32 PM, Blogger Trish said...

so cool!

He sounds like a mind reader. . .which is actually kind of creepy.

 
At 11:49 PM, Blogger LaskiGal said...

FREAK. That sounds like my husband. He is a freak with words. I mean, I'm the English teacher but he kicks my a$$ in Scrabble, Boggle, Hang Man or any word game. DRIVES ME NUTS!

He comes up with multisyllabic words. Me, I'm left with words like . . . YES. CAR. DOGGY. CHEESE. Yeah. I have no brain . . .

 
At 10:00 PM, Blogger kim said...

do not marry rain man.

 
At 7:54 PM, Blogger Chrissy said...

Oh, wait, that's NOT EVEN A WORD.

And Monica's voice from FRIENDS just went through my head. :)

 
At 12:54 PM, Blogger Cecily R said...

Mad hangman skills will get you far in life. Far...

Your last paragraph by the way? Gave me real LOLs. Real ones. :)

 

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