I have had job stuff and nothing but job stuff on the brain for the past week, which pretty much makes me the most boring person in the world. Here is a (partial) list of things that are much more interesting than me right now:
* Bleaching socks.
* Blowing air across a half-empty bottle of Dr Pepper to the tune of America the Beautiful.
* Googling random area codes to see what cities they belong to.
* Cleaning the lint out of the dryer.
* Watching a bug crawl up the wall, all the way to the ceiling.
* Seeing how many times you can shake your head back and forth before you get dizzy.
* Holding both arms over your head to see how long you would last in one of those endurance challenges on Survivor.
* Calling the 800 number on the back of cough syrup/Hostess cupcakes/L'Oreal mascara/whatever just to say hi.
* Counting how many squares are on a roll of toilet paper.
* Reading old term papers you wrote in high school English class ... which, yes, for some reason you still have in your possession.
* Engaging in a debate about what it means to be a "hollaback girl"
* Or what Fergie means when she talks about her "london bridge"
* And then wondering why you even care about two stupid songs that came out like two years ago anyway.
* Et cetera.
Actually, I take back what I said earlier. I've thought about lots of things besides work. Like, for example, I finally got around to reading the Oscar issue of Entertainment Weekly and I decided that if I ever win an Oscar, I'm going right up to Jack Nicholson and totally laying a big kiss on him before I go on stage to get my award. Just because it's Jack Nicholson. And it's the Oscars. And--
I'm sorry, you what? You have to go clean the lint out of the dryer? Fine. FINE!