Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Monday, July 02, 2007

She's alive!

Ohhh, life has been crazy lately. I'm sorry. A lot has happened, and I don't know what to say about any of it. I really don't. I need to sort it all out in my head a little more first, I guess.

However, I DEFINITELY cannot be Miss 1-900-Angst-a-Lot in this post, because the fabulous Jenster dubbed me a Rockin' Girl Blogger this weekend, and hello, I need to act the part! (Jenster, by the way, is a pretty rockin' girl blogger herself, as are all of the girls--and guys--who stop by my little corner of the blog world. I am very, very lucky!)

OK. So I'm going to jump around a little. Titanic is on right now, and now I remember why I didn't jump on the Leo DiCaprio train 10 years ago--he looks like a boy in this movie, and I like me some men. But since he looks like a man now (have you SEEN The Departed?!), I can look at him differently. As a result, I'm here to tell you that I would totally let Leonardo DiCaprio draw me naked and wearing only a blue diamond necklace. That's the conclusion I've come to after careful consideration. I also could potentially be coerced into crawling into the backseat of a car with him. MAYBE.

I got the funniest phone call tonight. Ohhh, I laughed. This guy I used to know years ago called me out of the blue. "Swishy," he says, "I think about you all the time."

Me: "Who is this?"
Him: "You still have that nice butt?"
Me: "WHAT?!" (immediately start cracking up)
Him: "I'm serious. You probably had no idea how bad you are. I bet you have brothers hollering at you all the time."
Me: (still laughing) "Who IS this?"
Him: "I love you. I mean, I LOVE you. But you would never give me any play. So I gave myself some time to lick my wounds, and now I'm trying again. See if you're ready for a man, instead of that boy Chris (a guy I kinda hung out with back then)."
Me (still laughing): "Hi, Michael."

I seriously hadn't talked to this guy in years. I was like, thank you, Michael, for boosting my self-esteem for a few minutes ... talk to you again in two years. Ha ha. Seriously, that's exactly what will happen. It's so funny and random.

Finally, I was at Borders yesterday in the cafe area doing some work, when (of course) I overheard the conversation behind me. I SWEAR this is what the woman said, because I actually wrote it down while she was talking:

"I know this man, his name's Bill Bommer. Well, that WAS his name. On his 50th birthday, he legally changed his name to Ken Kasey. That was his present to himself. I mean, he's not a strange person. He just always wanted his name to be Ken."

Which begs the question: If you could change your name to anything, what would it be?


At 9:04 AM, Blogger Beth said...

I always wanted to be named stacy...cuz she sounds like a blond surfer type girl from california...and I am SO not a Stacy!

Everyone needs a Michael in their life, don't you think?

Kick some ass girl!!!

At 9:40 AM, Blogger Trish Ryan said...

You ARE rockin'! That's why we keep coming back.

That's a hysterical phone call. Good for Michael. Sometimes I girl needs to be reminded of her value :)

When I was a little girl I changed my name about once a week, and then wrote my new name all over everything in the house. I loved names that ended in "i" so I could do a circle over it for the dot. I thought that was the height of sophistication...

At 10:39 AM, Blogger TTQ said...

Princess Angelina Contessa Louisa Francesca Banana Fana Bobesca III

At 11:31 AM, Anonymous Kristabella said...

Chrissy Snow.

At 1:21 PM, Blogger Lainey-Paney said...

yeah, I'd need my name to be "Shasta."

You know, it's like cheap soda meets pole dancer.

Actually, I think it would be fun for about a week...then I'd be tired of it, I'm sure.

At 4:26 PM, Blogger Manic Mom said...

OK, I love me some Swishy! And I miss you! We need, need, need to catch up!!! IM tonight? A date?? A cyber date with the Manic? Puh-leeease!

Bill Bommer. I think I would have changed my name the first time someone asked, "Paging Mr. Bommer. Is there a Bomber in the house?"

Duh. He waited till he was FIFTY to change his name??

I like my first name. I like my married name. While my maiden last name sounded cool with my first name, I am not sure I liked it all that much. We laughed at my sister in law when she married my brother and got our last name. It's just not very...Ooomph, yanno?

And cheers to a fellow Rockin' Blogger--can you believe we made the cut from Jennster!?!? She ROCKS!

At 5:14 PM, Blogger Senor Beavis said...

"Give me some play?" Did Young MC call you again? Ask if he's still wearing Cross Colours.

Hmm, I totally forgot the best new alias I had a couple weeks ago, but my pen name is Steve deJesus.

When I was little, all I wanted was like the most normal name ever since I was sick of getting teased about mine. I guess I grew into it as I got older. And Brad Pitt's character in a movie bore my name.

At 11:33 AM, Blogger Patti said...

i need someone to call me and tell me my butt still rocks...and i swear when i was young i asked my parents to change my name to sandy.

At 7:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I need some random to call me and tell me I have a nice butt. Niice. And I am LOL that you wrote the conversation down - I can so see that happening - hee hee.

I read a story that Picabo Street's parents let her name herself once she was old enough to do so...how cool is that? but then we'd be in a world full of 'Princess' hee hee.

At 9:33 PM, Blogger Jenster said...

I think you already know what I want to be called. Roxanne - or Roxy when I'm feeling frisky.

I totally agree about Leo. He was such a child in Titanic. It does seem he's grown up a bit.

LOL on the phone call.

And you TOTALLY rock! That's why I picked you! :o)

At 9:12 AM, Blogger Patti said...

what is the award?! i am asking around, as i am seeing it frequently, but have no idea what it is. but, go you anyway!

At 4:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I was in highschool I wanted to be called 'Amy' because all the cool girls were called that. And I just wasn't all that cool...

Now...hmm, I dunno, but it's gotta be one syllable. Like 'Trish' LOL

At 5:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

She is alive and very very well I might add.

At 2:23 PM, Blogger Andie said...

I always wanted to be named Elizabeth so I guess that would be it.

and hell yeah, Leo is looking MANLY and HOT these days. LOVED him in The Departed... rowr.


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