Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

How you know you're getting old and lazy

I check the mail when I get home from work, as I'm sure 99 percent of all Americans do. But lately I've gotten into a horrible habit: If there's nothing in there I care about, I put the mail back in the box and go inside. I actually put the mail BACK in the MAILBOX. It's out of the mailbox, it's in my hands, and yet I won't just take the final step and CARRY IT INSIDE. It's just more energy than I care to expend after a long, arduous (ha) day at the office.

So the Victoria Secret catalogues? The bimonthly community newspaper? That envelope stuffed with coupons that comes every few weeks? My cable bill? All stay in the mailbox until I feel like bringing them in.

I got my new issues of People, Entertainment Weekly and Rolling Stone today. I think it goes without saying that I found THOSE worthy of carrying inside.

13 Comments:

At 11:37 AM, Blogger kim said...

I like it.

 
At 5:31 PM, Blogger Beth said...

Hey, at least you have your priorities straight!! LOL! I will grab a magazine and leave a bill any day!

 
At 11:57 PM, Blogger TTQ said...

I actually started a war with my mailman back before I moved here..I wouldn't check my mail and he would send it back to whomever sent it and leave me notes that it was at the local post office..and when I would go to collect they would tell me they didn't have it..

round and round..the only thing that screwed me up was the water bill, you couldn't pay it online like everything else.. When I moved I had drawers full of unopened mail.. and then some..

But I have a mail/post office phobia..it's odd.. I was thinking about it yesterday..how I have the suburban house 2.5 dogs and one cat with a white picket fence and I still won't get the mail...or take the trash out, I'll collect it all from the house into bags and put them on the porch for honey to put in the hobo which he carts to the street on the appropriate days.

 
At 9:14 AM, Blogger Just A Girl In GA said...

Swishy,

Atleast you're checking the mail, I am to lazy to even do that. I go maybe twice a month to the mailbox and then its usually full of junk mail and flyers from Chinese Restaurants 30 miles away with a $2.00 off coupon. I just read ttq post and I am thinking I better start checking it a little more often.

 
At 11:20 AM, Blogger Patti said...

i'm so lazy i won't answer the phone...even if it's laying right next to me. i figure that energy is better spent filling my pie hole with ice cream.

 
At 1:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi from florida! have to check on my swish!

 
At 5:12 PM, Blogger Random Tandem said...

You... YOU are my HERO!!!

 
At 6:53 PM, Anonymous Kristabella said...

I wish they would put some sort of trash can in the entryway to my apartment building. Because then I don't have to carry it up three flights of stairs, nor do I have carry it AND throw it away when I get up there.

I'd be afraid to put it back in though, because the mailman like knows where you live and shit. :)

 
At 7:22 PM, Blogger Swishy said...

OK, I have to say, I never let it go more than a day or two, for that very reason. But it always strikes me as better to carry in two days worth of crap at once than a little bit every day. Better for it to collect a little in the mailbox than collect on my kitchen counter until I deal with it. I think that's the real reason.

 
At 9:32 PM, Blogger kim said...

Our mailman hates us.

 
At 2:49 AM, Anonymous Liz said...

I do that. It's fun. It's called "procrastinating", otherwise known as "awesomeness."

 
At 8:37 PM, Blogger Trish said...

LOL...

How about your fridge and closets? Do they get the same treatment? Just wondering.

 
At 11:23 PM, Blogger Trish Ryan said...

That is fabulous! I wonder if they'd stop sending catalogues if we all kept a Sharpie marker by the mailbox and wrote "return to sender" on the labels?

 

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