We're changing lives here
So last week, EW.com asked readers to submit examples of how TV and movies had changed their lives. Good news, kids, there are crazier people than your friend Swishy! My favorites:
* I lived in Maine for a few years because of Murder She Wrote. Seriously.
* My first trip to Hawaii was inspired by an episode of Step by Step. I wish I was kidding.
At first I wasn't sure if this one was serious--and I'm still not positive it is--but Entertainment Weekly seems to think so, and maybe they have some sort of elaborate vetting system. Anyway, the best one of all was this:
* I once watched an episode of The Simpsons where Homer was a truck driver, and he needed to stay up all night, so he pooped a whole bottle of caffeine pills, then balanced it out with sleeping pills to reach equilibrium. I had to stay up to watch a marathon of X-files on TNT, and went out to the 7-11, bought caffeine pills, and swallowed 15. If it couldn't hurt Homer, how could it hurt me? Well, later that night, I told my bro that I probably needed to go to the doctor so they can pump my stomach. I ended up not being able to sleep for two days, and my hand has a hidden tremor.
Ha ha ha. So then, naturally, I started thinking about mine. Like ...
* After I saw this one wall hanging made out of test tubes and a tool holder thingy on Trading Spaces, I became obsessed with making one myself. OK, do you know how hard it is to find test tubes? Test tubes that fit into tool holder thingies? I'll tell you: HARD. It took months--MONTHS--of calling stores and searching online. By the time my very sweet boyfriend-at-the-time found some for me, I'd lost all my passion for the project. I currently have a bag of test tubes collecting dust in the hall closet.
* I bought an outfit almost exactly like the one Calista Flockhart wears on the cover of the Ally McBeal soundtrack, only that one's purple and mine was gray and black. I also started wearing shorter skirts and picturing people's heads getting big and exploding when they were mad.
* I'm pretty sure I also might have used a line from Ally McBeal once when I was breaking up with a boyfriend. We talked and whatever, and I got out of his car and shut the door. Then, I very dramatically flung the door open again and said something like, "If I was going to spend the last year of my life with someone, I'm glad it was you." And then dramatically shut the door again and dramatically walked inside.
* After seeing Sleepless in Seattle, my life's goal became getting Meg Ryan's hair in that movie. Ditto for Reese Witherspoon's hair after I saw Sweet Home Alabama. Also, Reese's makeup. (It was a little bit of a slow movie. I had lots of time to study it.)
* Project Runway made me want to learn how to sew. This, in spite of the fact that I got a D in sewing in eighth grade. It hasn't really gone past that point, though.
* I'm not positive, but I have a sneaking suspicion that I started trying to work self-important, four-syllable words into otherwise ordinary conversations after Dawson's Creek came on the air.
* I anointed myself the next Debbie Gibson after I saw the Making of the Video for Electric Youth. I taped the show and watched it over and over again until I had the dance moves down, then unveiled them at my best friend's birthday party (the focal point of which was a lip sync and dance contest). I won second place in the dance contest, which I took as a total sign I was on the right track. (And, by the way, I WOULD have won first place except the first-place girl did a SPLIT. Like I'm supposed to compete with a SPLIT.) The next step was writing my own songs, since Debbie did, so I spent many hours lying on my bed, staring longingly at my ceiling, stringing together lyrics about rain and rainbows and true love. Unfortunately, in addition to the fact that I can't sing, my plan was foiled when I discovered rather quickly that I was a terrible songwriter. (Although, in my defense, using lyrics like, "I get lost in your eyes/And I feel my spirits rise" as my model did me no favors.)
The sad part is that I thought of all of these in like two seconds, so undoubtedly, there are many, many, many more. What are yours?