Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Wouldn't you like to get away ...

I went on a little retreat this weekend. I've been working on this project, and I finally got to the point where I really, really needed to sort of sequester myself to focus on it and wrap up the loose ends. So I'm at this lodge in the middle of nowhere right now. For real. Find "middle of nowhere" on a map, and that's where I'm at. It's a little unsettling. I'm not a city girl, per se, but I'm definitely not a country girl. It's a little trippy.

But it hasn't been much of an issue, because I've pretty much locked myself in the room and hidden the remote so I can work. I worked all day today, pretty much straight through, and I'm now taking a break so I can watch that documentary with Kiefer Sutherland on VH1. I am FASCINATED by it. It's not really about Kiefer Sutherland, it's about this band he's backing, but trust me that Kiefer is owning this documentary. He's hammered right now and seriously just dove into a 10-foot Christmas tree in a hotel lobby. I'd read about that in Rolling Stone and now I just got to see it for myself. Oh, Kiefer, my Kiefer.

Anyway, back to my little retreat. I get all settled in last night, and I go to jump online and there is NO INTERNET. I'm like, OK, it's a retreat, not a trip to a third-world country. I'm supposed to go without the Internet for 36 hours? Um, no. Several phone calls and near-fits later, I had Internet access. Yay.

The other thing about my retreat is that I will never eat again. I won't need to. I've eaten about a million calories in the past 24 hours, and I swear to you that's not an exaggeration. When I chain myself to the computer, I eat. Constantly. Mindlessly. It's just how I work when I pull a marathon session--I've got to have stuff to eat or drink. Or both. And I'm sorry, but who's going to sit at their computer for hours on end and munch on carrot sticks? Not me. I'm going to eat Twix ... and Chex Mix ... and chips and queso ... and McDonald's french fries (yes, there is a McDonald's here!) I feel like I'm going to puke, and I'm not sure if that's because I haven't eaten one nutritious thing all day or because I'm full. So you know what that means ... someone's going to be hitting the elliptical with her Britney Spears People magazine on Monday! I have been mostly drinking water, though, so I guess that's good.

I'll tell you about my project later. I'm very superstitious about some things, so not yet, but I will.

OK, back to Kiefer for a second. I am absolutely riveted by this thing. He is sooo funny. He has a little bit of a sad soul, too, but I suppose the most interesting people do.

19 Comments:

At 10:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

fries? chips and queso?! Oh, god, what I wouldn't give for some of that right now!

It sounds good to get away for a while...but I'm dying to know what you're doing!

 
At 10:44 PM, Blogger Jen-t said...

I find Kiefer fascinating too. I find retreats, hotels, vacations in general do not go well with the waist line.

 
At 12:33 AM, Anonymous Two Roads said...

Swishy, maybe you should check out that new book on Mindless eating.

 
At 3:10 AM, Blogger Drew Blackstone said...

If you hear a noise outside of your cabin at night, whatever you do, don't take off all of your clothes and run into the woods to investigate. No good ever comes from that kind of behavior.

 
At 9:10 AM, Blogger Karitown said...

Hmmmm, going away sounds so good. And yeah, not very good on the waistline. Drew, you crack me up.

 
At 11:22 AM, Blogger Swishy said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Isn't that the truth.

 
At 2:33 PM, Blogger Manic Mom said...

I am sure you are rocking on your project baby! Get it out before Thanksgiving!

And I wish I was with you! That would have been an awesome experience, eating fries and pounding away on the laptop next to you.

BTW, I am posting pics later of a man I met Saturday night who is a dead ringer for Mr. McDreamy, no lie.

Patrick Demsey was in the same room as I was! Wait till you see these photos!

 
At 4:57 PM, Blogger Trish said...

But Swishy, hon...haven't you heard? Food eaten away from home has less calories. And, if you break up a Twix bar and eat it in pieces it'll have less calories than if you eat it whole. Just tryin' to help :-)


Can't wait to hear what you've been working on...

 
At 5:13 PM, Blogger Frannie Farmer said...

Hey, I say the water was a good think - I would have been chuggin' Dr. Pepper .. add to those calories baby!
I eat when I type too - a bad, bad, bad habit. And the reason I will NEVER be a secretary!!!

 
At 10:41 AM, Blogger Bina said...

My God I wish I could do that! Just go somewhere, be alone, eat what I want, when I want until I have to Puke. No interruptions, aside from Keifer, but that's not so bad, right? Oh I am jealous!!!!!!

 
At 1:14 PM, Blogger kim said...

My husband has the same birthday as Keifer. Not sure why I know that, but I do.

 
At 1:21 PM, Blogger Allison Winn Scotch said...

Oh, crap! I'd meant to watch that Keifer show - EW gave it a great review. Crap, I'm hoping they'll rerun it. Oh, who am I kidding, it's VH-1! They'll replay it 32 times a day. Thanks for the reminder!

 
At 1:33 PM, Blogger Trish Ryan said...

Your retreat sounds awesome - who needs spa treatments and scenic hikes when you can have wireless internet, VH-1 and McDonalds???

You are my new first choice girlfriend to invite on a cross-country driving tour :)

 
At 3:24 PM, Blogger Karen said...

Wow, a self-directed retreat. How cool is that?! I can't wait to hear about the project. And now I too am fascinated by the Kiefermentary. I love Kiefer and "24," of course.

 
At 4:42 PM, Blogger Golightly said...

SHUT. UP.
What is the name of this wonderful documentary? I love me some Kiefer!

 
At 4:59 PM, Blogger Swishy said...

OK, seriously, you guys, the documentary was sooo good! It's called "I Trust You to Kill Me." It was commercial-free, so I don't think VH1 has shown it since ... they have to eventually, though. It's VH1! They show that Ice T Rap School thing like 1,000 times a week.

 
At 6:06 PM, Anonymous Eileen said...

I for one still want to know what you are working on.

 
At 5:00 PM, Blogger Swishy said...

Soon ... I promise!

 
At 6:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I would have had queso dribbled all over the keyboard. Good for you for getting in all those hours of solid work! So sorry you have miles to go on the elliptical. Although it sounds as if you're pretty dedicated.

It would be nice if I were.

 

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