Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Do you ever ...

... wish you could just say what you want to say? I don't mean, like, telling off your passive-aggressive neighbor who makes you cower in fear when you run the dryer until 10:03, although I suppose that counts, too. I just mean regular stuff. Like how you feel, or why you act the way you do, or how much someone means to you.

I do.

I HATE not communicating. I hate it. I think life is so much easier and better and more productive and fulfilling when you can just talk and listen. I think many more hurt feelings are caused by NOT talking than talking, and I think people waste a lot of their lives by not talking. But sometimes it's not that simple. It's awkward, or you tell yourself that you'll say it wrong or that the other person doesn't want to know or that you don't want to hear the response or that it's better just to leave it alone.

I wish sometimes it wasn't like that.

15 Comments:

At 12:52 AM, Blogger Manic Mom said...

I'm so glad you wrote this because there's been something on my mind I want to say to you.

You run the dryer at 10:30 NOT 10:03!!!

hahahahahah, and yeah, I had some appletinis tonight! But it started out with "Highlights and Happy Hour" over at our favorite place to get bikini waxes!!!!

xoxoxoxo

 
At 6:34 AM, Blogger Trish said...

Yes, so true...

Living in a house full of males I have found that communicating is something women do better. Reading over your post sounds just like me speaking to my hub...you'd never hear a man saying "I wish we communicated more..."

 
At 6:57 AM, Blogger Beth said...

awww Swish, what happened? sounds like more to the story...

It is so true that people get hurt more by NOT talking than by talking. Your mind can think of all kinds of things....just say it and get it over with, then move on. My hubs is a BIG non-talker...I think I need to slap him upside his head!

 
At 9:55 AM, Blogger Trish Ryan said...

I know what you mean. I don't think the past decade of sensitivity training, self-esteem promotion, and political correctness has helped us much in the communication department, other than that whenever there's a problem we now tell each other, "maybe you just need to talk more..." ARGH.

It's like that story in the Bible where God made all the people speak different languages. Don't you still feel that way sometimes, even thought we're all speaking English?

I think that's why I like writing - I do my best to get something across, but I'm a little removed from the fallout if a reader takes it differently.

 
At 10:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Getting past fear of rejection keeps us from doing many things.

 
At 10:28 AM, Blogger Whit said...

I wish the opposite. I pretty much always say what I mean, which is often what people don't want to hear.

Oh well, can't please everyone.

 
At 4:19 PM, Blogger Ramblin Rose said...

Hope your okay swish .... I so agree with you ....

rr

 
At 7:00 PM, Blogger Golightly said...

AMEN, Swishy!
I couldn't agree with you more

 
At 2:08 AM, Anonymous Eileen said...

You can always talk to us. Course we might blog about it- but we'll be listening.

 
At 2:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sometimes, when I can't bring myself to say something I really want to say to someone, I write it instead. It helps.

Thanks for a great post! c",)

 
At 9:40 AM, Blogger TTQ said...

All the time. But I'm a chicken shit.

 
At 1:50 PM, Blogger Frannie Farmer said...

I am so with you. I constantly find myself saying (to MYSELF, of course) 'wait until you have the right words..or you are calmer..or the situation is entirely different' .. the *when* never seems to come. I think that is why I turned to blogging. Trying to get some of it out there and maybe get some objective opinions ..
I hope you are ok! Here, you can speak at will ...

 
At 1:56 PM, Blogger Jess Riley said...

I feel really censored lately, and it's all my fault.

Then again, sometimes I say TOO much and regret it for a long time.

See, it's all a vicious cycle.

 
At 11:08 PM, Blogger Swishy said...

I'm so glad you guys understand! I'm fine ... don't worry! There are just days where I want to say stuff--nice stuff!--and I just can't, and I feel like I'm going to explode. You know.

 
At 1:18 PM, Blogger Bina said...

Swish, I feel the same way a LOT of time. My mind is telling me that people will think I'm weird, strange, a retard, or things will come out wrong, or the person doesn't give a crap what I have to say. I guess I'm always throwing daggers in my own mind and it really screws with me.

 

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