Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Float like a butterfly ...

I don't walk. I glide. I don't run. I coast. I don't jump. I soar. I move with the grace of a ballerina.

If that ballerina has cement blocks for feet.

OK, seriously. This is getting pathetic. There's a set of stairs that leads to the parking lot where I live. There's a light out there, but there's a shadow over the last step so it's REALLY hard to see at night. The very first night I moved in, I was coming down the stairs, missed the last step and completely bit it. (I was in a royal huff at the time, and not alone--let me tell you, it's kind of hard to throw a temper tantrum when you're doing a somersault down the steps.)

But other than my pride, no major injuries. So, OK, good to know. Keep an eye out for the last step. Which worked for, oh, a week. And then I tripped again.

Tonight, I was walking down the stairs and literally, LITERALLY, made a mental note: DO NOT FORGET ABOUT THE LAST STEP. Not 1.2 seconds later, I was sprawled across the sidewalk. Do I use my cat-like reflexes to catch myself before I fall flat on my ass? Do I use, oh, I don't know, the RAILING for balance? Of course not. Instead, I walk around like a sorority girl after her 10th shot of tequila.

Look at this! You would not think it would be so hard to walk down these stairs. I swear that last step moves. Seriously. It must.

7 Comments:

At 8:05 AM, Blogger Trish said...

I do the same thing on my front stairs only it's the top step I trip over when going up. It's a little higher than the rest and I forget just about every time. My neighbors must wonder about my alcohol consumption...LOL

 
At 9:43 AM, Blogger Beth said...

I did that too! I fell down my porch steps and dropped my 5 month old baby in the drive way. Maybe that's what happened to him!

 
At 2:40 AM, Blogger Kelly said...

LOL!
I do that stuff all the freaking time.
But...
Is it okay that I'm laughing AT you???

 
At 6:58 PM, Blogger mama kay said...

Ouch!
I am a world class klutz and can trip over air ...
Hope you are ok!

 
At 10:57 PM, Blogger Jess Riley said...

Dude! I have a great idea. A chair that glides up and down along the banister. No walking involved at all!

;)

 
At 1:10 AM, Blogger Swishy said...

Laugh at me all you want!! I'm happy to report I made it down the stairs in one piece tonight. I can hold off on the electronic chair a little longer :)

 
At 10:26 AM, Blogger Andie said...

I trip over my own feet all the time.

 

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