Waiting for My Real Life to Begin

The life and times of a girl named Swishy.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Oh, just admit it--you care, too

I was very, very pleased with People magazine when it managed to get the Brad and Angelina baby pics (the most absolutely gorgeous pictures EVER, by the way) to my mailbox the same day they hit newsstands. Shocked and pleased. Yay, People! But that fuzzy feeling is disappearing fast. WHERE THE HELL IS MY MOST ELIGIBLE BACHELORS ISSUE?!?! It has been on newsstands for FOUR DAYS! FOUR FREAKING DAYS! Yes, Taylor Hicks is INEXPLICABLY the cover boy, but there are lots of eligible bachelors in there that NEED and DESERVE to be ogled by me! NOW!!

If I find out my crack ho neighbor stole it, I will be irate. Absolutely irate. Especially given that, in addition to being a crack ho, she is asexual and therefore has no need for hot, eligible bachelors.

11 Comments:

At 6:33 PM, Anonymous jamie said...

I went out and bought that copy. my personal favorite is wentworth miller from prison break. yummy!!

 
At 10:16 PM, Blogger Trish said...

OMG you're too funny!

I've always wondered about bikini waxes...persoanlly I just shave. But here are days when I want it ALL GONE. Isn't that called a brazillian?

 
At 10:40 PM, Blogger Manic Mom said...

I've been dying to see the Shiloh pictures! But I haven't seen the copy on the newsstand!

Send me your copy Swish, okay? Like, put it in the mail THIS INSTANT!

 
At 10:40 PM, Blogger Manic Mom said...

Trish-I'll take you for your bikini wax--I took Swish! It was a blast!

 
At 12:46 AM, Blogger Swishy said...

Take it from me--Manic Mom is the best waxing escort EVER!!!

I have to get Shiloh back from my friend, but I will totally send it when I do!

 
At 6:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i'll make a baby with you.

chicago

 
At 6:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

over my dead body.

nashville

 
At 6:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

don't forget about me.

phoenix

 
At 10:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't make me put you all in prison.

Washington, D.C.

 
At 2:56 AM, Blogger Swishy said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 2:59 AM, Blogger Swishy said...

Duh, I am so dumb. That last comment (the removed one) was me, but I messed up. I was going to say ...

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

You are sooo my favorite.

I'm laughing so hard.

 

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